Jun 25 2008
Thong v. Sports Bra: Match-up for the ages?
It is the third week of June and already it is easy to see how one could be thinking “dog days of summer” when it comes to cable news stories. I am talking about the good, the bad, and the ugly underwear stories <cue the music>. This week, we have cringed in pain (and amazement) as an L.A. woman filed a law suit against Victoria’s Secret after being attacked by her thong; and, reveled in the McGuiver-ness of the American climber whose life was saved thanks to her sports bra. Thong v. Sports Bra…some serious poetic justice.
The thong takes heavy hits from all sides. The Smoking Gun leads with “Dinged by a G-String” (June 17, 2008) while other sites jump quickly into “attack mode”—that is, the vilification of the thong as an attacking entity… Is it possible we are witnessing media bias? UK’s The Sun (June 21, 2008) quotes the injured woman, a traffic officer (read: policeman?), as she described the incident, “I was putting on my underwear when the metal popped in my eye…” Metal…seriously? Well, not so much. The metal was actually a small ornamental attachment which mysteriously made its way into the woman’s eye. It is curious that some have actually attempted to explain this bizarre phenomenon by employing the laws of physics. I for one will take the woman’s word if it will spare me further details.
The sports bra (as every woman knows) is the hero of the week. The AP proclaims, “Sports bra saves US hiker in German Alps” (June 24, 2008). There is no mystery here. The climber, a woman from
Colorado, tied her bra to a cable used for moving lumber up and down the mountain. She was extolled by one of the Berchtesgaden police officers who rescued her, “She’s a very smart girl, and she acted very resourcefully…” Definitely a McGuiver moment. It just goes to show that underwear does matter and sometimes, beauty is not best. As for Thong v. Sports Bra: it remains a ‘split decision’.
